Idol Curiosity

I love American Idol. I am physically unable to not love American Idol. There are so many things I hate about it, that I bitch about, but it basically makes my life worth living, for however many months a year that it's on.

As a testament to my love, I was going to make a top 10 list of my favorite ever performances. But after spending several hours narrowing down the list of my favorites, I just cannot do a top 10. It's too hard. Then I was going to do a favorite from each season. Way too hard. Plus season 3 was worthless.

Sooo....I made a list of my top ___ (number to be filled in once I finally finish narrowing it down.) And since I'm sure you all THIRST to watch these videos, I've included a link, because I don't even know if it's possible to embed the videos in here.

SEASON 1

Kelly Clarkson - I Surrender Leah, I know you feel me on this one. Everything was so intense! The song was suspenseful! Dramatic key change! Omigod, Kelly's losing her voice, CAN SHE MAKE IT TO THE FINALE?!?! Spoiler alert: she can.

Also, if you do not love Kelly Clarkson after her winning performance, you are a big jerk.

SEASON 2

Kimberley Locke & Frenchie Davis - Band of Gold Pre-Frenchiegate. Two big black women trying to out-black each other in Hollywood Week. The winner? My ears.

Clay Aiken - Bridge Over Troubled Water I don't even care what y'all say about Clay Aiken, he can sing the shit out of a song. Bonus: this was the version we sang in chorus!

SEASON 3 was terrible.

SEASON 4 happened.

SEASON 5

Elliott Yamin and Mary J Blige - One Elliott is hands down my all-time favorite Idol contestant. Ever. And his finale performance with MJB is, as I believe we said back in that time, "off the chain". Granted, I find MJB annoying as fuck, but she's incredible in this. Watch Elliott hold his own as she attempts to drag him around the stage like a ragdoll! One of the best Idol performances ever.

SEASON 6 was a big one for me. Probably my overall favorite season, in terms of like-ability across the board.

Jordin Sparks - I Who Have Nothing Sixteen. She was sixteen when she sang this. Could you sing like this when you were sixteen? I certainly couldn't.

Blake Lewis - Virtual Insanity THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS, SOMEONE PERFORMED JAMIROQUAI ON AMERICAN IDOL. Blake Lewis deserves to live on in infamy for that reason alone. Unfortunately, he doesn't. That doesn't change the fact that I once paid $5 so that he would say my name in a youtube video, but that's certainly not the most ridiculous thing I've ever done in my life.

Chris Richardson - Geek in the Pink First of all, thank you judges for pointing out how ridiculous it was that he dedicated this performance to his grandma ("You've been invaluable tonight, Paula, haven't you?"). Secondly, I was so excited that Chris performed this Jason Mraz song that I nearly pooped my pants. He was cute as a button.

Phil Stacey - I Could Not Ask For More Again, I don't even care what you say. I LOVED Phil Stacey, and though this performance starts off rough and is almost nauseatingly cheesy, he kills it at the end. Plus, he missed the birth of his daughter to audition, so I think we need to give him some respect for the fact that his wife will hold that over his head for the rest of his life, and even after that.

Phil Stacey - Missing You Yeah that's right, more Phil Stacey. What of it? Leave his ears alone!

SEASON 7

David Archuleta - Another Day in Paradise NOBODY cared about this performance. Literally nobody. Archie probably doesn't even remember performing it. But I loooooved how he started this one out. Phil Collins haterz need not apply.

David Cook - Always Be My Baby Now, I will be the first to admit that I was extremely skeptical/overjoyed when I heard they would be doing a Mariah Carey week. But low and behold, David Cook knocked it outta the park! AND this was another super-dramatic performance, because this was the first and I think only week his terminally ill brother Adam could make it out to see him perform on the show, and it was great that he was there for such a great performance for which he received so much praise. David was super emotional, and it made for a great moment.

While I'm at it, I've basically always gone back and forth between indifference and annoyance towards David Cook, but then I saw this video, which totally changed my mind. He showed up to MC an event to benefit brain cancer, in the pouring rain, THE DAY AFTER losing his brother to the disease, and made this wonderful speech. Incredible.

SEASON 8

Matt Giraud - Georgia Fucking awesome. And this was during Hollywood week! MG is my other all-time favorite Idol contestant. Also, he used to be a dueling piano player, which, I think, may be the coolest job ever.

Kris Allen - To Make You Feel My Love I actually prefer his version to Adele's. So romantical. Maybe I'll get him to sing it at Jhole's wedding. In addition to Lifehouse. I couldn't find his actual performance, so here's the studio version featuring a really obnoxious picture.

Anoop Desai - Always On My Mind I forgot, as I was writing this, that his name is not actually "Anoop Dawg Desai". Thanks, Randy. Anyway, here's the audio of his idol performance with a really creepy still shot. And it cuts out at the very end.

Kris Allen - Ain't No Sunshine Jhole just had to change her pants.

Kris Allen - Falling Slowly I LOVE THIS. That is all. Studio version was the best I could find.

Matt Giraud - Hard to Handle This is a bit of a cheat, because he didn't perform it on the show, but he did perform it in the AI Live concert, and this is my damn list so I'll put it on here if I want. A quick visit to the Department of Backstory: I always loved Matt on the show, but my love was only musical. BUT THEN I saw him in the concert and was just...consumed with lust. He was not only crazy awesome for his entire set (a lot better than "Phone it in" Lambert, but whatever), but he was also rocking a fauxhawk. I will not apologize for loving a man with a fauxhawk. So anyway, this song was pretty much the peek of my lust.

SEASON 9

Lee DeWyze - Beast of Burden Because this song makes me want to make love to him on...like... a picnic blanket in the middle of the afternoon, to distract myself from his inability to sing the correct words.

Casey James - Jealous Guy I didn't even really care for Casey, but this performance won me over in a big way.

Lee DeWyze - The Boxer Crying! Parents! "I'm gonna try to win the thing, alright?" Ugh, I loves me a good emotional homecoming montage. His actual performance starts at like 2:40.

SEASON 10 just started! Here are the best so far:

Paul McDonald - Maggie May What a great little weirdo! He's adorable. And his teeth win at being white. Seriously. Theyaresowhite.

Also, while we're at it, his Hollywood week duet of Blackbird with Kendra somethingorother was awesome as well.

Casey Abrams - I Put A Spell On You This guy has already rendered every other contestant unnecessary. The best take on "I Put A Spell On You" since the Sanderson Sisters (2 points if you get the reference).

So that's all for this season, but I can wait to see what lies in store!

In closing, in spending HOURS compiling this list, I actually...sort of...forgot to actually vote for the boys tonight. I'M SORRY PAUL AND CASEY I HOPE YOU'RE SAFE ANYWAY! If they aren't I will never forgive myself/forget pretty quickly.