Shower Thoughts

I swear I thought of 1000 hilarious things that I just HAD to blog about while I was in the shower, but now I can't remember any of them.

And I meant I thought of them in the shower, not that I blog in the shower. Although, now that I think of it, the concept of some sort of waterproof computer somehow built into the shower wall would just be delightful! What the hell am I talking about, what do I need a computer in the shower for? My showers would be a million hours long. Although it would be helpful to have YouTube available as a reference for when I am trying to recreate 90s music video choreography in the shower.

ANYWHO

First off, it should come as a surprise to absolutely no one that I will be getting up at 4am to watch the Royal Wedding. My love for weddings only slightly outweighs my love for sleep. However, though I am setting my alarm for 4, I will probably actually be getting up anytime between 4 and 6, putting on my fascinator, and curling up on the couch. I don't even care that it's a royal wedding, per se. I'm just excited that a wedding will be broadcast in its entirety on TV, for me to watch in my jam jams. I wish they would give everybody's wedding this much attention! I wish there was a television network devoted entirely to weddings. Well, there probably is, somewhere, but I do not get that channel.

I am fighting a losing battle in my attempt to continue going to zumba classes (see also: going to the gym and/or dieting). The thing is, I actually LOVE zumba, I think it's so fun! I just wish it were not exactly 30 minutes after I get out of work. Not that I have to travel far or at all to get there, but I just need a bit to turn myself around when I get out of work. In gym-related news, I also love Planet Fitness, but it's just not worth my traveling to Rome every morning to go, I end up spending more time in the car than at the gym. I haven't been in several months, but I still haven't quit, so they're still taking my money, and I hate being one of those people. I mock those people who have gym memberships they don't use. I'm thinking of switching to Curves, because that's much more convenient location-wise, but I could not possibly feel any more blah about Curves. Planet Fitness is all...purple-y! Curves, I imagine, is not, and I'm anticipating it being so small and claustrophobic for a gym that it will result in me stabbing people.

I have had a word document open for over a week, in an attempt to actually do some non-social media writing. So far I have....*counts*...3 and a half sentences. It really serves as more of a guilt-inducing reminder than anything else. I don't know what my problem is, I just need to WRITE....SOMETHING! I think I'm so afraid I have no inspiration, no time to really dig in deep and accomplish something, and I'm afraid I've completely lost whatever ability I ever had to write. But I'm coming to realize that since I've pretty much come to the conclusion that going to grad school would be a massively unwise waste of time and money, I need to DO SOMETHING WITH MY LIFE or I'm going to kill someone. And I don't want killing someone to be the thing that I do with my life.

The thing is, I do have inspiration. I have a whole list of story and plot ideas, even for crazy things like screenplays and concepts for TV shows. My problem is I've got a vague idea of the Big Picture, a few really great ideas for big scenes, but nothing in the way of filler or character development. I have already, in so many instances, blatently stolen people from my real life and dropped them into one of my stories, because I am so terrible at character development. I feel like any character I try to create, without basing it on a real-life person is about as relatable as a mannequin. Not ever a supermodelquin, either. Though they're just fucking annoying.

I guess I'll just have to wait until we are in some sort of shipwreck/natural disaster/alien battle/plague, and I will survive, along with the cockroaches and Cher, and go on to tell our story to a future generation. Which, considering that it will be up to myself, Cher, and some roaches to create this future generation, I hope to hell I get some writing done so it doesn't come to that.

Our 10 year high school reunion is in 3 years, and by then I need to have accomplished something other than getting my driver's license. Because that does not so much compare to people getting doctorates and law degrees and getting married and popping out puppies. Because most people checked that off the list before we even graduated. Even if whatever I write is crap, I would like to at least be able to brag that I have written something the length of a book, and that I am "shopping it around to publishers". Because that will sound somewhat impressive, even if it is a blatant lie.

In other news, they released a trailer for the last Harry Potter movie. I watched it this morning, and came to the realization that I am most likely going to spend at least 50% of that movie curled up in a ball in a movie theatre seat, scream-crying. I wish you could all be here, so I could give you an example of scream-crying, but just imagine it as the loudest possible way of crying. I feel like it's just going to be all too much for me. Too much. I will not be able to keep my reactions inside me, so I will develop some sort of overemotional Harry Potter tourettes, and yell out things like "OH GOD HOGWARTS EVERYONE'S DYING ASK ME WHERE THE FUCKING DIADEM IS FRED FRED FRED RON HERMIONE JUST BANG ALREADY 'UNTIL THE VERY END' OH GOD OH GOD WTF FIENDFIRE FUCK YOU DRACO THIS EPILOGUE IS THE WORST THING IN THE WHOLE WORLD!" and then refuse to leave the theatre for hours afterward.

Oh god, why is it midnight and I am getting up in 4 hours to watch a wedding, and yet I am SO FAR FROM TIRED?! I will feel...poorly tomorrow. But woooooooo Friday!